so irratated (sp?) with myself I can't sleep

not even tired just keep thinking about how stupid I am and I how need to stop being such a wimp

I'm sure these pills dont help

is anyone awake, I'm really bored

Lots of hugs mb.
When I wind myself up I make myself do an alphabet game in my head (no googling allowed) where you go through the alphabet & name a town in the UK, a town in the rest of the world, and a country.
It's meant to stop the adrenaline flowing & let your mind calm down to sleep.
Not sure if that will help x

that would make me worse cos i'd be annoyed that I dont know the town then wont go to sleep until i figure 1 out

can we play the stupidest thing a man can say game?
my dads today
"you really need to start losing that baby weight Jade you are getting huge"

yes dad i realise in 2 years i've managed to gain 3 stone, no need to point it out to me.

Wtf! Ignore him jade, you're bfing & need to focus on just you right now, no extra stress.
The alphabet games are easier than I thought they'd be, just take your time with each one. I do deep breaths between each bit to try and give myself more time, I rarely get past h because my adrenaline calms a bit x

Jade you could play that game the way I do: with names. (Albert, Bernard, Casper..)

hmmm those games would take my mind off things

Ignore your dad, that's ridic. My dad is tactless as well xx

I used to do the alphabet thing too when I tried to go to sleep when I was younger. I thought I was the only one that did that haha.

I just picked a topic - anything, like countries, or cities, or names, or fruits, or animals etc. and went through the alphabet trying to think of one for every letter.

armadillo
bear
cat
dog
elephant

etc

Or to pass tIme you can think of amazing boys names for me xx ha

haha beth my dads been dumped loadsa times cos of it LOL

ohh just got some good news, an old friend is coming down at the end of the month EEEEEEEEEE

ohh Beth what about James?

Yay for friend coming down!!!

Mm I like James but I want something a bit unusual xx

Also did you have a lovely day? Did Eve enjoy? Xx

haha no a gypsy cornered me and made me pay £6 for a fake flower with some heather wrapped in tin foil, i tried getting away but she wouldnt let me past and was all in my face so i just gave her the money so she let me get away.
then i let eve play with the flower and she ate abit of the heather so i took it off her and now her face is all red so I'm thinking allergic reaction? :/
then i had a slush puppy to cheer me up and it wasnt dialuted so it tasted GROSS!

so basically Eve is teething and has allergic reaction so she REALLY wasnt happy :/

decided i dont want to go back to dorset steam fair again lol

Oh my gosh lol... Sounds like you had a fab day wtf was the gypsy doing?!? Sounds like Eve did have an allergic reaction, bless her.

Xx

no idea but i dont like her she was like "you will have good luck i can see it things are going to change" I must have looked well depressed for her to think things have to change haha
I was just thinking "well the good lucks not happening now otherwise I'D STILL HAVE MY MONEY!!"

yeah shes asleep now, ima check on her in a min though cos i'm scared she'll stop breathing now ¬¬